I waited for you by our tree
On the hill watching
The sun set lighting the clouds on fire,
One glorious explosion
Before day yields to night
The tears on my face that fall
When you don’t show,
Or say goodbye.
Hold the broken pieces in your hand of the vase you bought,
So perfect, not quite the same as the one you really wanted,
But almost perfect enough that you glue the pieces back
Though it can never hold real flowers in water again.
So it holds silk flowers-
silver medal never gold,
Second best never good enough
As the first, the original.
Now it’s flawed forever
Scarred forever marred forever.
Can never hold water again.
Can never be whole again.
Can never be perfect again.
Can never be the one you said you wanted.
Can only be hidden, faced to a wall,
Boxed up locked up
Might as well be thrown away
For it’s not worth the effort
To recycle reuse repurpose
The pieces into something
more beautiful than the original.
It’s not worth the effort to love it more now
Than when you bought it…
Because it isn’t what you wanted in the first place.
Now I lay me down to sleep.
For my bones, do not weep.
I do not lay here wanting grief;
In my rest I’ve found relief.
No more worrying over day to day affairs;
No more crying over unhappy cares.
In the earth I now have peace;
In the quiet all has ceased.
All my sorrows are washed away;
No more suffering, no more dismay.
Weep not, I say, for what is gone
Look to others, look to your own.
Care for those who continue to struggle,
Care for those who cannot juggle
The mind’s chess game with them as pawn.
Weep for the living, those who walk alone.
Turn your eyes and hands to them,
Let your love be their stem.
For it may be their life was spared
Because of you and those who cared
To see the pain behind their tears,
Who understood and calmed their fears.
Then come the morning and the rising sun
Come to me and say, “Thy will was done.”
And I will smile in my sleep
Because you did not weep.
*Probably a good idea to not snack too close to bedtime…you know, in case you wake up crying from a dream you can’t remember and the lines to a poem running through your head and neither will let you get back to sleep.
You may love – be sure to keep your distance.
You may care but don’t beget insistence.
You may wish; you won’t get what you wanted
It never could have been the same as what you thought – you’re thwarted. Continue reading
Say you never hurt me. Say it again.
Because maybe then, as you say it, it will be true.
Yes, this is how we are now. This is how we’ve always been,
You’ve just ignored your part in the process.
As you said, actions speak louder than words,
and, baby, your actions are a fucking war zone.
Go ahead, say you never hurt me.
The scars on my heart tell a different story.
This is what’s on my mind?
What’s taking space
While I can’t find peace
Or thankfulness? Continue reading
Life is full of circles
Cycles of disappointment
Happiness spun in
And always the larger orbit
Grinding away Continue reading