Disclaimer: Rough language and a Spongebob reference…you’ve been forewarned.*FOR HOO. THIS TOO SHALL PASS.
THE MERCENARY OPTIMISTWhen my house was eaten by nematodes I didn’t wake up and say “Hooray Skips, we are finally huge!” I more likely said, “What the fuck? Really? I need this?” Never said was, “Well, I guess I deserved this.” * Okay, that didn’t happen but if it did… That’s how it would have gone down! When the car was stolen For the third time I didn’t walk around the block like I did the first time Thinking, “Maybe I forgot where I parked it.” No, by now I was tainted, “Oh my GAWD! NOT AGAIN! You, Bastards!” But this time I did not call my mother and ask,, “Why me?” When my tour guide got killed I’m ashamed to say that I did take an inventory Of everything that had gone wrong on that trip. It was pretty selfish of me. I attribute it to shock. CPR and all, we had tried our best, But he still died. No one was to blame. When I found out I had cancer, I didn’t and never will I ever say, “Well, maybe I needed a wakeup call. Maybe this will transform my life.” It has but, I’m still pissed. Turns out the pissier you are, The longer God lets you live. Go figure. Nobility in self loathing? No. It just doesn’t pay. Z~